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The Evidence Journal

Posted on June 29, 2017 by Heloise Jones
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The man at the door was tall, thin. His face was nice. Angular with smooth skin. And open, ernest expression. He looked to be in his 30s. ‘Paint your address on the curb,’ he said. I noticed the small portfolio with stencils, the caddy of spray paint. I told him I was renting. ‘I do it for $10, but I’ll do it for free,’ he said.

Most of the time someone hears I’m a writer, they say they want to write a book or they know someone who’s writing a book, or like one neighbor who sauntered over as I stood in the street watching numbers go down, says anyone can write a book, it’s easy. The young man fell into the first category. He had a book he wanted to write.

It was late, toward dusk, so I didn’t ask right off what he wanted to write. When I did, he launched in with a long story that didn’t sound like a book, though the person telling it did. Because while I learned why he was painting numbers on curbs for $10 a pop, that his smooth face belied the scars covering his body, and that he’s experienced a long line of sad ironies in his life, his character came out in the telling. Including his deep desire for connection and to be heard, revealed as he packed up for the curb across the street. ‘Come over,’ he said, ‘we can keep talking.’

In my book “The Writers Block Myth” I talk about the Evidence Journal. A piece of paper, notebook, or small book you can leave on the counter, the corner of your desk, or put in your bag. I emphasize it must be something tangible, because memory is a trickster. As humans, we dwell in expectations and judgements. We focus on what’s not there vs. what is there. We discount triumphs, possibilities, and any evidence things are different than the stories we hold in our minds of what’s true. And as writers, we’re pulled out of our process where creativity dances. Our creative life can feel squeezed by life in the real world. When what we want is to feel we’re writers no matter what’s going on in our lives.

I’ve had a desire to get back to writing fiction and poetry. I’ve mentioned it before. I’ve written several poems. Yea. The stories in the ethers have been more elusive. The good part is I’m an intuitive writer. I hear characters and stories. I know to be open and release judgement over what shows up. Still, I feel frustrated at times.

What happened in the street that evening while the guy painted my curb went into my evidence journal, because I saw I’m on the edge of receiving those fictional stories. Because I thought about a novel when the neighbor said anyone can write a book, it’s easy. I was present as the young man told me his story, and later, I thought of prompts from what he shared: He worked for the railroad. The girl’s father. . .  The evidence is clear.

We write everyday in ways we don’t consider true writing: Facebook posts, emails, lists. We take walks, go about our homes or work, and don’t consider what we see as feeding our writing life. The truth is, every one of these activities holds a prompt we can view and hear without judgement or the long story attached to it. Every one can be used to move us forward, whether it’s fiction or nonfiction, poetry or that essay about how to change the world. Call it observing with awareness, something writers do. Call it being a writer.

  • When you notice and observe what’s around you, write those minutes down in your evidence journal. Put a star next to it.
  • Look and listen for 5 objective prompts for your writing. Make a list.

The curb was rough, so it didn’t turn out exactly pretty. I paid him, anyway. The following morning, I realized the gifts I got in the process.

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Posted in life, writers, writing | 1 Reply

Editing, Life or a Book

Posted on June 17, 2017 by Heloise Jones
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The other morning I thought I’m editing my life. And immediately thought, exactly like editing a book. I’m taking out what doesn’t work or serve, keeping what supports the structure of my life.

I’d just cleared small piles of papers I let accumulate around the house in everyday living. Cleaned screens and windows I intended to clean when I moved into my sweet home months ago. It led me to straighten the storage area in the garage and start to sort through boxes I brought across country, consider what stays and what goes. I know stuff will go. It’s here simply because I had no brain cells or energy left for decisions by the time those boxes got packed. All decisions reduced down to expediency.

I wiped the dust from the lids of the plastic bins I bought, will make those decisions as I transfer things for safe keeping from mice and whatever. As I consider how I’m constructing my life, aka story.

This whittling down to what truly adds value for me comes after four major downsizes in five years. Final edits before I fill in what I’m building now.

I do have a short inventory of what will flesh out my home. A small bookcase, narrow bench for the portal, mulch and large pots for flowers to make my moonscape yard inviting. The additions in the yard not simply for beauty, which is important to me, but a landscape I’m building. Important details.

I know feng shui, and I’m creating flow. I know interiors and design, have been a visual artist, and I’m choosing the elements for the whole.

Our life in the real world is our creative life. We edit it as we edit any work we write. We use the same rules. Editing is a creative process as much as anything we build or generate.

It was uncanny how my activities this week were such a blatant reflection of that editing process. Right after I announced to the world how much I love editing written works.

  • Notice the story a closet or the landscape around you tells.
  • What important details do you pay attention to when editing, either in life or your writing?

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Posted in life, Uncategorized, writing | Leave a reply

Every Writer’s Superpower

Posted on June 8, 2017 by Heloise Jones
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I’ve been giving a series of mini-workshops drawn from my book, The Writer’s Block Myth. I learned the other day in a writing group someone drove to the wrong library a week early for one of them. A library 20+ min. from town. I was quite moved. We chatted for a long time. I learned she was a lawyer, a story chose her to write it as a book, she wants to write a blog, and a host of other things that solidified a connection between us.

I talk a lot about writing as connection, and it certainly was that day in the way it brought us together. While talking with her, I couldn’t help thinking about our writer’s Voice. How it develops, and we grow into it, learn to accept it. How it changes across genres.

Because I heard her skill with words when we shared our raw work in the group. Something I’m sure writing & oratory as a successful trial lawyer helped her develop. And I got curious when she shared her blog, how she’s incorporating a device that’s quirky to the serious topic she’s passionate about, could be considered by some off the wall. This would reveal the heart of her Voice, it’s the only way she can pull it off, I thought. And the book will require a storyteller with sensitivity to tell it. Another sort of ‘different.’ She’s embarking on a journey with Voice, I thought.

My journey started as a novelist and poet. When I joined Facebook, I found my online voice. Then used Facebook as a writing practice. Meeting the challenge of engaging readers in a way they experience something. Editing much of what I share like poetic stanzas. And that practice and those stanzas feed my poetry, and sometimes my blog.

When I started my blog, I learned to write essays for online reading. Learned how to weave in narrative and stories.

When I wrote The Writer’s Block Myth, I discovered how much the economy of online writing and reading had affected my writing Voice for the page. My process is longhand, pen to paper, for rough drafts of fiction and poetry. Something that takes time. That in my discipline I don’t allow edits while I write. The finished piece a form that calls for breath.

And for the past 2+ years, I’ve been writing essays and nonfiction, where it’s fingers to keyboard from get-go. Editing part of the process moving forward. Even in my blog ‘Getting to Wise. A Writer’s Life’ blog, which is a sort of journal about navigating life. Journals something we think about writing by hand. I had to write the entire manuscript of The Writer’s Block Myth twice to shift into the Voice that works as well on paper as online.

I’m calling up my courage these days to once again learn to write in longhand the stories with breath that satisfying long-fiction requires. And I’m also learning a new way of writing as a speaker and mentor in front of groups of people. I’m embracing all sides of my writer’s Voice.

Because our writer’s voice is our Superpower. It’s the one thing only we can deliver. It’s where our genius lies, in all its aspects and forms. I know I’ll have this discussion with her. And it will be exciting to see unfold.

I bought Brian Andreas’ book, Bring Your Life Back to Life – A Guide to Effortless Joy. On the inside he wrote, “To Heloise – Just a reminder of the great joy that sings in the heart of you. With Love, B Andreas”

It came to me our writer’s Voice is what sings in the heart of us.

  • Consider your writer’s voice. How it’s different, or the same, across genres. How comfortable you are with all aspects and forms of it.

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On a New Path

Posted on June 1, 2017 by Heloise Jones
1

“There are elements that determine paths taken,
and we can seldom find them or point to them accurately. . .”
~ Elizabeth Strout (from “My Name is Lucy Barton”)

Last week I saw a short video of documentary filmmaker Ken Burns talking about story. Everything he said rang true to me. And what stopped me cold was the reason he said he does what he does.

He tells historical stories. Is now known for what’s called the Burns affect, blending first person narratives into the telling of events. He surmised his ‘why’ for doing these types of stories led back to his mother. He never knew her well. She had cancer his entire life and died when he was eleven. “It might be that what I’m engaged in, in a historical pursuit, is a thin layer thickly disgusted waking of the dead. . .may be very obvious and close to home who I’m really trying to wake up.”

I often say the Universe swoops in with answers to my questions. Delivers messages in articles, quotes, passages in books, and random words. Hearing Ken Burns when I did was no accident.

I’d just gotten a new awareness about how I’d generalized to the world at large a message from my mother. One I received from the time I was very small. The message I’m too much.

The awareness came after a conversation that’d turned strange and difficult. A comment made that immediately felt true & not true at the same time. It took days to sink in that so many variables affect perception – experience, preference, information given, how the brain works, one’s own tics, rules of Truth, interpretations.

What was true – in that moment, and perhaps in many moments, I am ‘too much’ for that person. And her reason why is valid. I have responsibility in this. And for my mother, I was indeed too much. The evidence not only in words, but action. She sent me to my grandmother’s when I was 18 mos. old. It was 190 miles away. She couldn’t handle my newborn sister and me at the same time. Something I learned while sitting at a small table in a Mexican restaurant at Disney’s Epcot with my father. ‘You were gone six weeks,’ he said. ‘I wanted you back. So, I went and got you. You were just a little girl.’ The pattern repeated my entire life growing up.

How it turned wrong is I embraced that message so strongly I made myself smaller, quieter, less Me in response. I carried it like a flag draped around me and saw the whole world repeating it. I forgot I can take responsibility, and the message is as much about the other person as it is about me.

Ken Burns says we tell stories to continue ourselves. I believe that’s true, too. Those of us who are storytellers can see how we include ourselves in what we write. If not directly, our passions and interests.  I write stories about outliers, good people with a longing for Home who are at a crossroads. Stories about loss. And in my novel (‘Flight’), set in 1952 rural Appalachia, I rewrote the story of my mother and me.

A mother receives a prophecy her beloved tiny boy will leave her and the mountains while still young. Believing fate unstoppable as mountain code dictates, she withdraws from her son to steel him for his fate. Eight years later, as the prophecy unfolds, watching and protecting her son from afar is no longer tolerable. She reckons with her choices to get him back, and breaks code in the process to save herself, too.

A year passed before I saw fully what was there. The mother’s choice was a sacrifice. She had a good reason, beyond her perceived control. The longing I felt for my mother burned in the boy. The abandonment in the end was not hers, but his, and neither wanted it. It had to happen. Death was the alternative.

As my mother lay dying, she told my husband how much she loved me. Something I always knew. She also said she never understood me. “From the time she could talk, before I could think of an answer to her first question, she’d ask another,” she said. That revelation rewrote the story of us together, too. And was a comfort for me.

In looking back, I see my path has been one filled with grace. The unfolding of my childhood story at a time I could understand it, the story I was given to write in my novel, and the story I’ve created over and over in life.

Now it’s time to move on, be more than I’ve been. Which also means being less than I’ve been in many ways, too. For one, I can let others get the details of me wrong. It doesn’t matter. What matters is I’m rewriting my story once more. I chose the stories with love at the center, and still do.

Another small journey. Getting to Wise.
A Writer’s Life

Tell me. . .what stories do you choose?

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The Writer’s Block Myth
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Posted in family, life, spirit, writers, writing | 1 Reply

Revelations in Narrative

Posted on May 27, 2017 by Heloise Jones
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“I think I’ve been making the same film over and over again, asking who are we. . .”
~ Ken Burns, documentary filmmaker
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The other night I watched the movie Dark Places, created from the novel by Gillian Flynn. My only thought when it was over is she has one wickedly good mind. I’ve read her work, know what a good writer she is: Tight narrative drive; twists and turns that readers love; a tad on the dark side, something I think all humans love. But what struck me was an element I saw that I’d seen in another one of her books.

In both “Dark Places” and “Gone Girl,” someone who’s innocent consciously makes an ultimate choice that condemns them and shapes the entire story. And quite frankly, both choices creeped me out. Not only because of the consequences for the characters, but because they’re wrapped in so many layers of contradiction that they left me supremely uncomfortable.

Narrative and all the ways it’s in the details of life, cultures, and our own heads has been up for me lately. Narrative being the telling of a story, the point of view, the consistent themes and patterns. That includes the perspectives spoken and unspoken, known and unknown of the storyteller. And often, for writers, contain a recurring theme or element such as Flynn’s central choice made by an ‘innocent.’

Consider John Irving, how he always has a writer in his novels. Elizabeth Berg writes intimately about women’s inner and outer lives. Frank Herbert created worlds with new languages. Societal moral dilemmas show up consistently in Philip K. Dick’s work. Personal moral dilemmas in Jodi Picoult’s work. One writer I read regularly describes the sky.

We can’t know what these specifically mean for these authors, or what exactly it reveals about them, but we can be aware for ourselves.

For now, look at the books you read and the movies you watch. What do you notice consistent amongst them beyond genre? Now, look at your own work.

  • Find the recurring elements in your work, and you find out a bit about yourself. Sorta like looking in a mirror and noticing something for the first time. And if not the first time, seeing another layer. You’ll become braver in your work. And your work will go deeper.

I’ll be writing more about this.

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